Pardon me, sir. I did not do it on purpose. - Queen Marie Antoinette after she accidentally stepped on the foot of her executioner as she went to the guillotine.
I can’t sleep. - J. M. Barrie, author of Peter Pan
I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis. - Humphrey Bogart
I am about to — or I am going to — die: either expression is correct. - Dominique Bouhours, famous French grammarian
I live! - Roman Emperor, as he was being murdered by his own soldiers.
Dammit…Don’t you dare ask God to help me. - Joan Crawford to her housekeeper who began to pray aloud.
I am perplexed. Satan Get Out. - Aleister Crowley – famous occultist.
Now why did I do that? - General William Erskine, after he jumped from a window in Lisbon, Portugal in 1813.
Hey, fellas! How about this for a headline for tomorrow’s paper? ‘French Fries’! - James French, a convicted murderer, was sentenced to the electric chair. He shouted these words to members of the press who were to witness his execution
Bugger Bognor. - King George V whose physician had suggested that he relax at his seaside palace in Bognor Regis.
It’s stopped. - Joseph Henry Green, upon checking his own pulse
LSD, 100 micrograms I.M. - Aldous Huxley (Author) to his wife. She obliged and he was injected twice before his death.
You have won, O Galilean. - Emperor Julian, having attempted to reverse the official endorsement of Christianity by the Roman Empire.
No, you certainly can’t. - John F. Kennedy in reply to Nellie Connally, wife of Governor John Connelly, commenting “You certainly can’t say that the people of Dallas haven’t given you a nice welcome, Mr. President.
I feel ill. Call the doctors. - Mao Zedong (Chairman of China)
Tomorrow, I shall no longer be here. - Nostradamus
Hurry up, you Hoosier bastard, I could kill ten men while you’re fooling around! - Carl Panzram, serial killer, shortly before he was executed by hanging.
Put out the bloody cigarette!! - Saki, to a fellow officer while in a trench during World War One, for fear the smoke would give away their positions. He was then shot by a German sniper who had heard the remark.
Please don’t let me fall. - Mary Surratt, before being hanged for her part in the conspiracy to assassinate President Lincoln. She was the first woman executed by the United States federal government.
Now, now, my good man, this is no time for making enemies. - Voltaire when asked by a priest to renounce Satan.
No, but you forgot the best one
Either this wallpaper goes, or I do- Oscar Wilde, dying in an unfortunately papered hotel room
today was my last day in my creative writing class and my teacher gave everybody a piece of paper to write down a contract and to put it in our wallets. she said she did the same thing when she was younger and every now and then she’d brush by it and remember that she wanted to write. everybody took time to write out what they wanted and I just sat at the back of the class, sitting on the windowsill and I knew there was only one thing to write but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. at the end of the class after everybody left, I went to thank her for the year, and she told me that people should be reading my words for a long time, but they won’t be able to do that if I’m not around to write them. I showed her the blank piece of paper, and she said it was okay not to write anything, and then I wrote this. I learned the power of words in that class, I learned it was okay to vomit up half a dozen notebooks stained with blood and exploded pens because it means you have something to say.